Categories
2024 – Winter

Letters from a legion soldier to his wife

Author: Nikita A. Ivanov

This is day 234 of war, I think…The days are hard to keep count of. The incessant screaming is like background music. We are stuck amidst this crisis between good and evil. Going to work every day is not a blessing. I have lost many friends, you make them as fast as you lose them here. We are the country side of Ukraine, it’s “safer” here. The village I am stationed at is ridden with the smell of death. In the age of quantum computation and the multiverse theory this all seems so futile. Yet we prevail in the name of glory…I just hope this will end one day. This is killing me but I am killing others, for what?

This rage I feel, I let it out on the anti-aircraft guns we are provided with knowing well that a soul is lost if I hit the plane. My colleagues are even crazier then me. They drink bleach and shoot the enemy by day, smoke by night, telling tails of a simpler life they had whilst bombs and lost bullets fall in the distance.

Luckily, Alison is safe at home with you, my precious little angels. She is a fighter, literally. I met a general by chance on a week I was able to escape from this dreadful situation. I taught her how to fight, she even went up against the general or at least someone who claimed to be it. We met him in a bar in Switzerland, while I was on vacation. The man was a coward…got beaten up easily by a 20 year old girl, thinking he was the king of the world. Probably had an ego complex or something thinking he could win against our daughter. Nevertheless it was a fun encounter, we got drunk and just let our problems at the door. We did talk about one subject that stuck with me, patience is key. He told me удачи тебе and we went our separate ways.

This letter might get to you but everything is so uncertain right now. In this darkest hour always remember this. Failure is not fatal, it’s the courage to continue that counts. I think it was some bloke who said this during the second war. Even though in this case, one shot in the right place may mean that I will never see you again.

Stay strong my tulip,
Leonard

Categories
2024 – Winter

TELEPATHIC SHOCK & EXCITEMENT

Author: H.S

In my life I’ve seen many peoples and have been to many places, but I’ve never been to a place with as many people as the Fête des vendanges in Neuchâtel.
I must try and carefully chose my words, and hope through telepathic shock & excitement you see in your mind the exact ekphrasis of it:
From far away, from my white 2000s apartment complex which dominates the city scraping the black sky at night up above, you can hear in the thick coarse foggy night the festival calling.
The city becomes unrecognizable – the entire old city center, pedestrian, gets swallowed in a black mass of people like black petals of chocolate in dough – stands are erected, tents, stages for music, food stands of all nationalities vying for the odorous control of the streets –

The stands!
Each political party has their stand selling the ever-present democratic beer – you can see the left & right wing and the drunks who made it their civic duty to go back & forth trying to decide politically who’s got the best beer – the results of these great inebriated deambulations will influence the next election.
The green stand of the UDC Green-clad in their traditional Swiss clothing, blue jeaned & behatted, but too expensively wrist-watched and smelling of expensive cologne, making them seem like insurers and accountants mascarading as working class.
The blue-clad liberals looking like economics & business students, just slightly too neat for the bacchanal of the streets before them.
The socialists, red-clad motley crew with colorful posters all over the wall of the stand – Tattooed cool cats and the only women serving.
The communists not here this year. But I remember once in La-Chaux-de-Fonds they served Sagres or SuperBock which are THE working-class Portuguese beer.
And you have to shout to order because of the insane tittle-tattle of speakers –

Listen! the whole of Latin-America blasting their enchiladas with decibels which I assume adds flavor – giving the tortillas tinnitus.
Greasy American grub, and here and there the gentrified hipster vegan burger that coast 25 bucks with no fries which costs extra.
Afro-beats ringing in backstreets, for they have the worst locations – but shoulder-to-shoulder they dance, the drunk red-faced Swiss passers-by and the black Swiss busting out moves for their families and friends.
All of this just under windows of the old city center – old crones crowned above waiting at their balconies for 10pm sharp – they shout that the music should stop but they keep pushing it to later and later but the police is coming! A stampede on those backstreets broke my nose one year!
Rock bands playing live at big venues which blocks the arteries of streets like cholesterol does the heart of man.
Jazz joints at the periphery, near wooden temporary chalets in which you get local absinthe, the green gold whose drops are mined from the Val-De-Travers – the green fairy, who watches over all of us in this canton and we love her.
Chiller atmosphere there, more mature – the jazz bands are playing for 50 years old dads and moms who let their children roam around the crazy night.
The rap stage! Usually the main plaza is home to the buzz of buses, busy bees yellow-painted in my memories and following their comrades through the streets, but this weekend is the festival’s and so the buses must go.
So the rap stage in the middle of it and DJ blasting the latest American trends – and if you wanna see fights you go there.
Once I saw a woman dragging another by the hair while she herself was getting hammer-punched in the face repeatedly by another dude – that’s where you go to get punched in the face.
And the main stage and stand – in the middle of the middle of the heart of the heart of the center of the center of the city – right by the public library unrecognizable and unseen behind the huge stage that’s in fact three smaller stages linked together and interrupted by bars, and that’s where they blast (quote) classic (unquote) tunes that everybody knows and in drunken revelries sings with no effort put in harmonies or pronunciation or in fact volume.
Everyone SCREAMING not singing – arms interlocked and dancing a mad cadenza – songs by groups like Indochineeverybody singing the lyrics –
The bar underneath the stage besieged between tunes – and the DJ expertly doing whatever, here a classic, then a pop-song, then reggaeton, back to known tunes, and so on and so forth – the music blasting everywhere at everyone, your chest vibrates from the bass, your heart feels trapped in its cage as the ribs shake and shatter and you feel the music physically booming in your heart.

And the funfair! while the west and center of the old town are blackened and moisten by beer-&-wine drinkers & pukers, in the east you have the funfair –
The colorful light bulbs dotting the attractions which get lost in the air and bedazzles the water during the night –
The funfair is just above the harbor so you see the dark mass of the lake interrupted by fog which makes it a sea of darkness, but before the wall of clouds that darkens the night you have the many-jeweled water and its rainbow reflection of the funfair –
The water in the dark, slimy and gooey, captures the light voraciously.
The funfair with its unimpressed and bored looking Romani people talking French with impenetrable accents, nodding their head “no” to 8 yrs old children when they ask if they can still get a small prize if they missed the target by so little?
Grimy, dirty, colorful, gaudy – good fun but watch your pockets!
Churros covered in Nutella passing by in children’s hands, you just smell the fragrance and you go get one too –
Couples trying to win the big unicorn or dolphin plushy at a rifle stand –
The clerk is surrounded by the terrible beasts of the jungle, all fuzzy and cute –
The teenagers drunk on Smirnoff ice and Malibu screaming obscenities and being boisterous at the boxing arcade machine, challenging each other to punch harder that the last –
one of them hits the bag with his head and they scream laughing –
Another uses his elbow –
“Wow I got 8000 points” “Ah yeah? Well, I just got 8200, pussy!” “Ah yeah? I’ll show you!” and they spend coin after coin trying to beat each other.
Cotton candy flying in the wind as children lose control of it, or lose it to the drizzle that diminished the calm.
I had great sad dates after the Fête des vendanges had ended at the funfair, when everyone is gone and the weather is gray and the wind is blowing and the sad reflection on the thick puddles breaks your heart but you heal it with grease and cinnamon.

So many things I’ve not talked about!
The way the evangelical church on the street that leads to the train station tries to evangelize the drunkard rats of the night by giving them orange juice and sandwiches –
The way you see so much blood, vomit, sperm, shit, and all other human fluids spilling in the streets but everybody wallows in pig-like happiness –
The way you lose your wallet –
The way your ears ring –
The way you’d make out with four people you don’t know (with tongue) just because they liked the way you danced –
The way you’d be drunk one night to the point of not remembering and still go the next morning to get a caramel crepe –
The way that on Saturday night people from other cantons come and that’s when you can see knife fights by the fog-lost lake –
The way you see children, as young as thirteen binging for the first time and staggering along with their friends one on each side – getting their first binge first kiss first love first heartbreak first puke and first pickpocket –

The way you see & lose everybody there every hour or so, going to a stand with one group of friends, seeing your parents on the way, losing your friends, seeing your high-school sweetheart with her friends and hanging out with them, meeting a bunch of cool Frenchmen and dance, losing them too, meeting a girl and making out, losing her to the great sea of people, seeing your initial friends finally at 2 AM by the kebab stand eating and going back to do it all over again!

THAT’S IT! The Fête des vendanges, but you have to live it with wine in your belly, music in your feet, beer in your hand, and stars in your eyes.

Comments by the jury:

“The writer brings the Fête des vendanges to life on the page. The reader feels a little drunk by the end, is pleased not to have been punched and, with ears ringing, would also appreciate a kebab.”

“Very beautiful use of language, I think it renders the atmosphere really nicely in an almost oneiric way, and the depiction of all the different people and things was done in a very level-headed manner, which I thought was nice.”

Categories
2024 – Winter

Embracing the Abyss

Author: CT

Can you understand my sweet song? Are you even able to hear me? Do you know that, like you, I roam the vast seas? My best friends are clownfish, I talk to sharks, and I accompany green turtles as they lay their eggs. Ethereal jellyfishes and witty baby dolphins play with me. From the shallows to the tides, waves hold no secrets from me. This marine universe enchants me, and I sing its wonders.

But at the moment the ocean’s magic leaves me indifferent, another spell drives me. For several moons, I witness your fishing attempts, the sleep you cannot get, the words you scribble… I wish I could help you. I wish I could tell you that I am there, that I am watching over you. Not only that, but I can carry you away from your torment. Trust me, I can take you to the shore. You are slowly passing away, I watch you fade… I cannot force you to follow me. They forbid me to touch you. I think I remotely – love you.

Your strength inspires me. You are so pretty, so lonely… The waves carry around your orange raft. If only I could talk to you, you would know that you are loved by a fish woman. And suddenly, you throw a bottle in the sea:

Message in a Bottle

Rocked by the foam,

Moved by the mist,

In the endless sea I roam –

I cannot resist.

The emptiness of the abysses

Dresses me in its vices.

But my ship just sails,

Refuses to join the ocean’s entrails…

What a pitiful odyssey…

I am lost at sea.

Where is the shore?

The green grass I adore?

Far from any light,

I fight through the night.

I shine with my last glow,

And send the missive below:

You’ll find in my lines

A testimony of my last sunshines,

A desperate donation,

To Poseidon.

No matter if I cannot decipher your encapsulated words, I want to free you. Your distress hits, no matter the language. Your pain shatters me. Drawn by courage and pity, I reach your coral vessel and pull myself to the deck. You scream when I appear. Wide-eyed and breathless, you stare at me. I am shaking as much as you are but I timidly offer you my hand. Your emerald eyes roam over my anatomy: they observe my shiny chest, and they question my flamboyant feminine features. They meet my ruby pupils, then they follow the curves of my pearly hair. They, finally, gaze at my iridescent scales, that long azure fin that sets me apart from you. Emotions cross your fiery face; I recognise surprise, fear and hope… Perhaps even a glimmer of desire? Suddenly, you snap out of your contemplation, you gather your last strengths, and you run into my arms. Your legs around my tail, your heart against mine, I drag you down with me. We let the ocean host our tender embrace.

Too bad for Poseidon!

I received an unexpected aid – 

I was freed by a Mermaid,

Thanks to Cupid alone!

Comments by the jury:

“This is an original story in both format and in the narrative form. I love that the POV is from the point of the mermaid and enjoyed the twist.”

“I found the format very original and interesting, it piques curiosity, and the poem (message) included was so lovely. I also appreciated the originality of the p.o.v, I didn’t expect to read something like that at all, it’s such a great turn on the usual mythical takes!”

Categories
2024 – Winter

In The Water

Author: Anonymous

It is always the places that can so easily overpower me that somehow make me feel at peace. The mountain that could so easily isolate me, the snow that could so easily freeze me, the water that could so easily swallow me up. As unpredictable as these places can be, they remind me that I am a part of something bigger and that my existence relies on my surroundings. I am at their mercy. Whether it is walking through the snow, the flakes crunching beneath my feet, through a trail in the woods, on a mountaintop, or swimming through the water, the silence in these places is loud and full.

Instinctively, I would say that the land that means the most to me is up in the mountains or by the lake. There is something about the mountainous lakeside that is so very Switzerland, that is so very me. Despite being born abroad and only in Switzerland by chance, the Swiss landscapes have become an integral part of my identity. With countless hours spent hiking, skiing, and relaxing by the lake, it would be a lie to say that this environment has not shaped me. The place I visit the most, however, is the lakeside. In the summertime, the lake’s glittering surface is reminiscent of all the good that the world has to offer—the light reflecting off the rippling water, a perfect image of hope. The mountains surrounding the body of water bring a sense of peace that the often-revered seaside does not. The lake-side peace is accompanied by the cheerful chatter of people around me, no doubt relaxing after their busy days. A summer day by the lakeside helps me feel grounded. The grass beneath my legs as I sit, the rocks under my feet as I climb over them to reach the water, the sun burning my skin; the land envelops me, welcoming me into its world. Making me not just a part of the world but a part of nature, too. The gentle, rhythmic lapping of the waves, the splashing of the swimmers, and the chirping of the birds quiet my endless thoughts.

The lakeside is, however, not always entirely peaceful. The turbulent surface crashing on the lakeside rocks during a summer storm reminds me just how powerful the water can be.

The muted blue of the storm clouds and the splashing of the waves – always so much higher than I could ever imagine – remind me that nature is not always forgiving. It reminds me that being part of nature means that I owe it my respect in return. If I do not treat my surroundings as they deserve to be treated, if I act bigger than I am, I will be reminded of just how insignificant my day-to-day can be. Watching the angry lake fight the sharp rocks and the birds take cover reminds me that my daily anxieties and obsessions are not a finality. That the world goes on beyond my internal storm. A storm, which I witness mirrored in front of me as the forces of nature war against one another. The storm I watch, with thunder crashing around me and the water roaring, though, subsides. This shows me that no matter how angry, or how turbulent, the sun will always shine through the clouds. Both in nature, by the lakeside, and in its reflection in my soul.

Upon reflection, though, the place where I feel most at peace is not only the lakeside but also in the water. I am unsure what it is about the water that makes me feel so at home in it. Whether it is that I grew up swimming, or if it is the endless possibilities it offers, the water has always welcomed me. It doesn’t come without its apprehensions, the water. I can feel its power, its ability to throw me around, the total darkness and disorientation as soon as my head goes under. The eternal tightening in my chest causes a sense of urgency almost immediately. But as soon as I open my eyes, as soon as I see the pale green blurriness of the lake water around me, the bright light shining through the surface, and the almost eternal expansion of blue, I feel in control. My body allows me to appreciate my surroundings – albeit for a limited time – before the breathlessness makes itself known once again and forces me to resurface. To regain strength before I can dive again. Before I can delve back into this wonderfully unfamiliar world.

While many speak of the terror of the depths of the waters, the endlessness has always fascinated me. These depths that are so often equated to anxiety almost always make my grounded life feel two-dimensional. In the water, I am no longer bound by gravity. In the water, I become capable of exploring the dimension all around me, rather than being limited to observing from afar. In the water, I can fly. It allows me to feel everything that I look for in sports, but in water, I am no longer at the mercy of the apparatus. I no longer need to swing, I no longer need to race towards a trampoline or ski through powder to feel weightless. To explore the true potential of the world’s three-dimensionality. In the water, I can be everywhere, and I can be nowhere.

In the water, everything slows down. My surroundings, my movements, and my thoughts. In the water, I am free of all my earth-bound responsibilities. I get to feel the cold currents wrap themselves around my legs without having to fit into society’s glass slipper. In the water, my hair flows around my face, never weighed down by the air’s dryness, its pressure. In the water, I am free.

Categories
2024 – Winter

Something Forgotten

Author: Amélie My-Linh Dauban

It had been a long time since she had not felt such a peaceful feeling in her heart. In the past weeks – no, in the past months – she had been so disconnected from herself, from the world around. She was walking from place to place, moving from task to task, like a sleepwalker, robotically doing what she was expected to, without even wondering if she liked it. All that mattered was to get the job done. Perform well academically, exercise daily, fake a smile, overwork herself, pretend she was doing fine, that she wasn’t tired, pretend she didn’t care. But maybe that was in fact the problem. Maybe she forgot how to care. She was so caught up in her exhausting routine that she was not seeing the world around. As if she had become empty, soulless, a creature made of void and darkness, barely looking human from afar.

And yet, for the first time, she felt something. At last. She had returned to her hometown, where all her happy memories lie. Her parents’ warmth, her cosy house, her messy room, but above all, above everything, the forest nearby, where she would wander for hours during long walks and runs. The place where her heart truly lies.

She took a long breath. The air was cold, smelling like wet leaves and rain. She let it fill her lungs, then watched it twirl in a foggy cloud of smoke. A little smile stretched her lips. She looked around. No sign of civilisation to be seen. Only a cathedral of trees, throwing their arms towards the sky in a vain attempt to reach the stars. The leaves were playing a soft melody together with the wind, upon which the birds sang. Of all the music in the world, it was her favourite symphony.

Raising her eyes, she gazed at the orange sun disappearing behind treetops, painting the sky in shades of pink, yellow and turquoise. The grass was already covered in frost, even though it was not winter yet. On the floor lay a carpet of brown and golden leaves, resting in peace after a warm and green summer. It was freezing, foggy, mysterious. Light was slowly decreasing, creating quite a spooky atmosphere.

Yet, the girl was not afraid. On the contrary, she had never felt freer than here, alone among the trees. Overwhelmed by a sudden burst of joy, she started to run and jump and dance. Why walk in a straight line at a constant pace? As if life was constant and straightforward. As if the human mind was constant and straightforward. It was not, her heart was a hurricane, and she could not hold it in any longer, she had to let it out, express the winds shaking her, carrying her like a bird flying on hot airstreams.

She felt so lucky to be alive… The forest was her castle, her queendom, her only home. She started running faster, she was one with the wind, she was one with nature, with the world, with herself. For the first time since what seemed to be for her an eternity, she felt like she belonged.

And suddenly, it did not seem to matter to be the strongest, the wittiest, the most knowledgeable in the room, wherever she’d go. All she wanted, all she had ever wanted was to be happy and free. To exist without a purpose, for the simple joy of being there, in the moment. 

Slowing down, she paused a second to recover her breath, ecstatic. The first stars were illuminating the sky, alongside the dazzling moon. Suddenly, she saw something move in the bushes. She held her breath. An animal? Trying hard to not make any noise, she walked closer. Quietly, a red hairy head came out of the leaves. A fox! She could barely contain her excitement. The creature calmly walked by before disappearing again, closely followed by its fluffy tail. It felt like magic, truly.

Full of these forgotten core feelings, the girl started heading back to her house. She better get home before it got dark! Now she knew she was the same as the child who would go on tremendous adventures in these woods, finding wonder behind every trunk, magic in every leaf that falls. She was still the same as the girl who would enjoy a comforting hot chocolate after a hike with her parents, still the same as the little wooden elf she imagined herself to be when she was little. Her heart belonged to the forest, and never had it beaten louder than in this very moment. She knew who she was, and she was by far enough as she was. No need to prove her worth. She was the daughter of the wind, and her fate was to live forever free.

Comments by the jury:

“I admired the protagonist’s bravery and was pleased it was rewarded.”

“The use of several adjectives in a row is, in my opinion, a very lovely way of describing things, and the use of punctuation in general rendered the thinking process quite wonderfully.”

Categories
2024 – Winter

From his prison of a mountain

Author: CZ

From his prison of a mountain, he watches us.
He watches us as we march in the streets towards our future,
He watches us as we wreck the Mending Walls into a bridge,
He watches us as we crack the codes of propaganda’s game,
He watches us as we cry for our brothers and sisters around the world,
He watches us as we tear off the chains around our voices,
He watches us as we see past the glamour of fae
celebrity,
He watches us as we scream a NO! into the
cycle of hurt,
He watches us as we reveal the hoax
of the Dream,
He watches us as we set free
the conditional of love,
He watches us as we
get up from the bed of
conformity,
He watches us
as we carry his fire,
He
watches the
eagle recoil in
fear,
From
his prison of a
mountain,
Prometheus
descends.

Categories
2024 – Winter

A Journey of Emotions

Author : N.R.

I.
There’s a thickness in the air,
It feels like life never was fair. 
Why did you abandon us?
Left to drown, hearts filled with pus.
Anger rushes through my veins,
Peace no longer reigns.
Where do I go from here?

II.
Tear tracks stain my face,
I’ve finally found my place.
We must stay strong,
The fight will be long.
We must never surrender,
To stop would end her.  

III.
It’s been a rough ride,
Victory finally by our side.
Gone are the feelings of pain,
Only strength to gain.
A long nap, I shall take,
Content, will I wake.

Categories
2024 – Winter

Ask-the-Students: If You Could Go Back in Time and Talk to Your Past Self, What Would You Tell Them?

Image: © Roger Ce, Unsplash License, Source.

MUSE asked students to anonymously submit their opinions* on what what they would tell to their past-self. Here are the answers we got from them! Some are sweet, some are the harsh truth and some just good advice.

Conclusion: there is hope and there is light at th end of the tunnel and don’t hesitate to ask for help!

You’re gonna get through the dark times!

*Replies have been edited for clarity.


You found the right person for you.

Be more gentle with yourself, and understand that just because you do someone a favour you cannot expect the same in return or you will continously be disappointed. We are all different.

Do not apologize to people who disrespect you and don’t care about you!

Don’t be too hard on yourself!

You will meet people along the way.

Keep the good memories and don’t be sad to see people go; sometimes it’s for the best.

Letting go doesn’t mean the end, but the start of something new.

Hey! It’s gonna be okay!

You’ll be fine. It’s hard right now but you will make it through.

You’re gonna be awesome!

Don’t lose your iPad!

You’re gonna be able to talk to people and they probably won’t kill you if you hang out with them.

The thing you’re experiencing is anxiety, go talk to a therapist for the love of God!

Stop comparing yourself to others! It’s harmful to your mental health and well being. No one is perfect or has everything figured out. This will make it easier to progress in your life!

Do NOT erase the entirety of your computer accidentally! (This is higly specific, and yet the only thing going through my mind right now).

Nothing. I don’t want to risk changing something and not ending up where I am now. I quite like my life as it is. Maybe I’d ask her to go talk to that one girl though.

Categories
2024 – Winter

Winter

Author : Federica Mazzella

What it was in that

Winter Night

froze in time

and I keep —

cherishing it,

holding it tight to

my Chest

as the ice dissolves

and the only

thing left of it is

the memory

and cold blood

stinging.

Categories
2024 – Winter

No Return Flight

Author: N.R.

It was a warm autumn day as I made my way through the bustling streets. Humming a slow tune, I saunter towards my next stop. 

How long has it been since we last came here together, hand in hand? The laughter we once shared, echoes in my ear as I push the door open. The strong yet welcoming scent of ground coffee beans fills my nostrils. I find myself gravitating towards a well-lit display of carefully curated delights. 

The owner greets me from his place behind the counter.

“It’s good to see you again! Did life get busy?” he asks. 

“Yes. Things just have a way of building up in such a short time. Had to take some time off.” I offer as an answer. 

As we continued to make small talk, I could not help but feel a twinge of sadness. It wasn’t long ago that we were here sharing desserts and sipping on drinks.  Now here I am. Alone. 

I make my order and head for an empty table. I watch as people trickle into the café, laughing amongst themselves. At a nearby table, friends are passionately talking about the places they plan to visit. As their chatter continues, my mind starts to drift, as it often does these days. 

Floating through clouds, I find myself remembering our last few discussions. Unlike before, your eyes now held the look of someone who had given up. No longer were we sharing the same goal of reaching destinations we once gushed about.

Refusing to let the delays fill my heart with despair, I strapped myself in, determined to fight for both our dreams. I would have done anything to keep hope afloat. If your air mask malfunctioned, I would have given you mine without a thought. I wanted to be the one to bring you to safety.

We made it through several turbulences before our final plane made a sudden drop in altitude, forcing me to come to terms with my worst fear. The denial was spilling through the cracks of my foundation. 

It took our last transit for me to understand that nothing could keep you from making the wrong turn. You kept adding luggage that could not be repacked and continuously refused assistance from help counters along the way. 

I had lost sight of my own plans and itinerary. Standing at that terminal, I made up my mind. 

It was time for me to put myself first and book a flight of my own. Like any other passenger, I deserved a trip where my choices were not restricted or forced to compromise. 

It took several errors and frozen screens, but I made it to my new boarding gate. 

There was no looking back. No last calls to make. 

Suddenly, my ears feel a popping sensation as I hear my name being called. I stand up and make my way to the front. The owner, having wrapped everything nicely, gave me my to-go bag. 

“Don’t wait too long to come back! Why don’t you bring that friend of yours with you next time!” a courteous smile on his face. 

“I will! Have a nice day!” I replied. A few seconds later, I was on my way. I pondered over my plans for the afternoon. 

With no surprise, I reorganized my thoughts back to a few minutes ago. Will there be a time when we visit the café together, like before? How soon could that be? 

Probably not right away. It’s too late to take a return flight to your side. For now, there are no more connections to make, given that the borders are to remain on lockdown.

Perhaps it was for the best that we ended up at different terminals. 

It leaves the possibility of finding a different way, back to each other. After all, we all started off as strangers.

Nothing is stopping us from creating a new and improved flight connection together. Till then…

                                                          –     Ready for Take Off      –

Categories
2024 – Winter

This soup has a doggy taste!

Author: Erika Castrillón Morales

[Content warning: animal sacrifice]

Every April, we climbed the mango tree. It was on the terrace of the house I grew up in. Green-yellowed leaves decorated its arms, but the mangoes were always late, or they never arrived. We climbed and played in its branches, hoping not to fall. I used to slide my little fingers through the crackered bark to peel the cortex. If you were lucky enough, you could make tiny balls with the tree’s resin to play with. All the kids in the neighborhood loved that tree. Every one of us had a story to tell about it. 

***

In August 1976, Antonia Villalba moved to Barranquilla, a bustling and noisy city like all the ones in the north of Colombia. She was a tall, pale, rounded woman, strong, and bulky. She came from Bogotá, the capital, or ‘la nevera,’[1]as we called it in the Coast for its cold weather. Too cold for people accustomed to more than 34 degrees Celsius in a tropical country.  Antonia had also lived and worked in the countryside of Santander, for many years. Well accustomed to the hard work, the woman knew how to ride a horse, how to raise a family, and specially, how to cook with gifted hands. After my grandfather died, my thirteen-years-old mom took control of the house. To have an income that could ease the hunger, she began renting out some rooms in the family’s household. Antonia moved in with her three kids and her parents. Her husband, a truck driver, had died in a traffic accident. She decided to move to Barranquilla, where an estranged cousin had settled in the city and also married a truck driver.

Antonia always loved to earn her own money; she juggled between jobs to take care of her family. Having set up a small convenience store in our house, she started selling roasted food.  Antonia bought the goods at the market. Early in the morning, she got on crowded buses, filled with people from various backgrounds: employees, foreigners coming from nearby areas and small villages, domestic workers, salespeople, merchants, and another informal workforce.  Successful businesspeople, public servants and doctors never took the bus, they took taxis or drove their own fancy vehicles. The market was a conglomerate of people coming from all over town. You could find city halls and offices next to hospitals and food stands, decorated with long queues of people waiting to enter any of those buildings. Street sellers offered bracelets and rosaries in the middle of copious fragrances. The odor of smoked fish appealed to those craving a hearty breakfast after running errands for a while. If you were looking for something lighter, you could try a buñuelo with hot coffee. The city was, and still is, a living being in which all citizens acted like organs making the body function. At 9 am, Antonia was back home with big bags of fresh vegetables and groceries to sell. José, her eldest son, had already started serving customers. 

Weekends were special as she set up plastic tables and chairs on the terrace for people to come and eat. The tables were nicely dressed up with floral pattern coverings and embroidered ends. On Fridays, she came from the market with a goat kid. During the afternoon, you could hear the poor animal howling when Antonia killed it. She then made pepitoria[2] to sell or some roasted goat on Saturdays. She also came with roosters. She plucked the chickens and seasoned them with a red paste made with bell peppers, onions, achiote and salt. She then put the chicken on grills and sold them with salty potatoes. Of all the food she made to sell, she always gave some to my mom. Sometimes Antonia gave even more than what she owed her in rent. In the end, it was a transaction based on solidarity. 

On Sundays, Antonia made a humongous soup pot, a sancocho. She knew her cousin spent Sundays with her husband’s colleagues and their families. Antonia invited them to come around and buy her some soup. They accepted the invitation and were all delighted with the food and friendly time. It then became a tradition to have lunch at our house on Sundays to enjoy the roasted chicken, goat or soup, or any other exquisite dish that Antonia made, thinking about her old Santander. Those dishes included in every stir or cut the traces of nostalgia. 

Antonia’s youngest son was a little boy called Juanito, five years old, and there wasn’t any difference between him and a Tasmanian devil. He looked just like his mom, and he was born just before his father’s passing. He ran around the house, playing in the dirt and driving everyone crazy. That boy was pure chaos, but sometimes, he was lonely. His mother was busy making some money, so she could not watch him all day. His siblings had school or were helping Antonia. The boy’s loneliness and sadness grew more and more evident. Antonia felt guilty about her son, so she came one afternoon with a puppy to keep Juanito company. They called it Zeón. Juanito and the dog were very alike, messy, and dirty. With its tender eyes, the creature captured everyone’s smiles and caresses. 

One Sunday, it was the birthday of one of the truck drivers. Antonia woke up early, as she anticipated many people that day. She had promised them to make the best sancocho one had ever tasted. An array of potatoes, sweet, and green plantains, calabaza, yam and cassava.  Gallina criolla and carne salada, a meal which ‘industrial’ could never define.Word about the famous soup spread all over near neighborhoods. At 7 AM, Antonia had already cut all the vegetables for the soup. The meat had been soaking in spices overnight. José started piling firewood in the backyard. Antonia carried the pot and put it in the fire. The smell of the smoke flew around the houses. People passed by in their Sunday best and said hello to Antonia on their way to the Mass. 

That day Juanito was more restless than usual. As a tornado, he ran with the dog from here to there in the house while Antonia kept asking him to stay still. Giving up, she told him to go out and play with the neighbor’s son. Juanito took the dog with him.

José was sitting next to the pot to make sure it wasn’t going to burn. When the soup was ready, José put a lid on it and went to help his mother with another task. It had already been a while when Juanito and the dog came back. They started running and playing around the soup pot. Suddenly, a clattering noise and a pitiful bark resound in the backyard. José heard Juanito’s laugher, and he knew something was wrong. He went running to see what happened. Shocked, José cried for help “¡Mamá, mamá, Juanito tiró el perro en la sopa![3] Luckily, the soup was no longer boiling. Antonia, shaking nervously, hurried up to take the dog out of the soup while menacing Juanito with a beating. Juanito, seeing that his mom was not joking, ran as fast as a runaway puppy. With his short arms and legs, he climbed the mango tree. He then waited at the top, looking at the bottom where Antonia held a heavy belt. We also had stories concerning our mothers’ belt.

Antonia yelled “¡te me bajas inmediatamente de ahí, culicagado!”[4] She was furious. Her pale face turned red with anger. At the corner of the street, the trucks’ honks were loud. People arrived on foot and some others getting out of taxis and private cars. It was too late to start cooking another soup pot. And how could you explain such a mischief? Antonia gave Juanito a last look. “¡Te bajas, o te bajo, y ya verás!”[5] The boy got out of the tree. His mother grabbed him by the ears and ordered Teresa, the middle sister, to clean and dress him up. José took the dog and gave it a bath. 

People came into the house and warmly greeted Antonia. Everyone took a seat. Teresa started serving the delicious-looking soup. Plates were passed from hand to hand, with lemon slices and rice. Pepitorias, arepas and some aguapanela were served. They were laughing and making jokes. Through the radios, some Vallenato and Cumbia were heard. Someone took a bottle of aguardiente and made a grimace at its bitter tasteIt was a festive and happy Sunday in the Colombian coast. After quick belt strokes, Juanito continued to happily play with the dog. But away from the soup. The guests kept coming for more soup and more rice. What an amazing cook Antonia was! Everyone who attended the party that day kept talking about it for months; years passed, and everyone remembered Sundays at Antonia’s. But no one dared to say: ¡Esta sopa sabe a perro![6] 


[1] Spanish word for fridge. 

[2] Colombian dish typical of the Santander Department made from the goat’s entrails, blood, and hard-boiled eggs. 

[3] “Mom, mom, Junito threw the dog into the soup.” 

[4] “Get down, culicagado” (Colombian slang word for a little kid, usually a mischievous one). 

[5] “Get down or you will see.”

[6] This soup has a doggy taste.

Comments by the jury:

“I think it was a lovely rendering of a funny anecdote through adult eyes; it’s very self-aware and socially-driven”

“I appreciated the details of the food, how she made it and what she used in the recipes. … I was thankful that the dog survived its encounter with the soup!”

Categories
2024 – Winter

“Shall Statues Overturn?”

Author: Anonymous

I have been thinking of museums of the mind and of the art in my head. 

When I looked this morning at those pristine buildings with marble statues, I was faced back with a sort of blankness. As if every colour on a palette had been mixed and created a white of the purest kind, where one would have expected brown to appear. 

The statues were in a row. Two pairs of two, flanking the sides of the front facade. They acted as columns, supporting the weight of the entire roof upon their shoulders. What dignity, what pride, what strength… what made them bear it all so easily? Was it their doubling, the fact that they could see themselves physically in someone else? 

Would I be surer of myself, if I had such a presence to affirm my own existence? 

But, then what… obsessed with my own image, a Narcissus of some sort? No, becoming a flower was decidedly not the aim, though it would not be the most disagreeable fate of all. 

And oh, to be a tree… like statues, immobile. But they spoke if you knew how to listen. I used to talk to a tree in my schoolyard as a child, and she talked back. I cried all the tears in my body when they cut her down.

They would not cut down these statues, I thought. Monuments were built to last. Not like little children’s dreams.

Below those statue columns, I saw a mother and her son on the left and a man holding a sword on the right. As stoic as stone, he was every virtue personified.

And the mother?

She was smiling, seeming happy. “’ Seeming’, Madam? Nay, it is”

Was she happier than the statues of the Virgin Mary? In her quiet, unknown love, not one of public property – not placed in cathedrals and sung to, nor on little altars in Italian houses. Standing on a tall facade, looked at, but rarely talked to. 

Who would talk to statues anyway… they’re all dead. 

But shall they overturn, shall they rise? I would like to hear them speak, of faraway lands and of languages long extinguished. Would they even be bound by our time? 

Just like Adam and Eve were born of clay, we could become statues when we die. Not in the way the so-called “great men” do. Not in a cold, dead way. We could be of cracked stone, and smile to the wind, and let the birds sit on our shoulders. We could then whisper to the people passing by words of wisdom, and give them a little luck, for their lovelorn lives. 

Yes, I have been thinking of where museums begin and where they end, and I now think I know. I shall whisper it in your ear, somewhere, sometime, soon. 

Images: ©️ Anonymous author
Images: ©️ Anonymous author

Images: © Anonymous author

Categories
2024 – Winter

Parasouls

Author: Nathalie Hayes

“This has to be one of my absolute favourite places,” She sighed.
“You always say that!” He replied. Dismissal was his favourite type of response; attack, his favourite type of defence. All in all, he was difficult to converse with. But she consciously let it slide off of her, as she took in the bathers immersing themselves in the dark, sparkly emerald water. She anticipated the cool, liquid touch on her skin, the absolution of emersion.

The sun was high in the sky and you had to squint against the reflections on the lake, that magnificent body of water surrounded by mountain peaks, ludicrous in its beauty, and the glare of the yellow parasols, with their warmed canvas smell.

The ice tinkled in her cocktail. She had wanted a drink before the swim. He was taking a break from alcohol. Buoyed by a little buzz, she smiled at him to make their way towards the hot concrete steps upon which lay the sunbathers, post-swimmers, readers, towards the metal access ladder. One woman was holding court to a bored couple about the trials of having holidayed with her sister’s children. Her nasal, whiny drone ploughed forward, pulled along by how hilarious she was finding herself. On and on about the tedious detail of her banal existence. She tried to catch his eye, but he was mouthing some sort of stream of consciousness that he couldn’t divulge should she ask him what he was thinking. She nudged him, tried to point with her eyes, an attempt at a shared joke, but he just replied with a loud “What?”, and she let it drop, along with her black summer dress.

If only humans could be as enduring as nature. The mountains and the lake remained unblemished and generous, as they always have and always would be. Quite the contrast to the inevitable decay of the body, the waning of relationships, so fickle. The water understood acceptance as she lowered herself in, quick gasp, before delivering herself to the pleasure of being held, lifted, loved unconditionally.

Comments by the jury:

“I also enjoyed the implicit descriptions. We see and feel the black summer dress without needing to be told what it looked like.”

“Very Sally Rooney-esque in the phrasing and atmosphere. … I thought the unconditional love of the lake was a lovely subject.”

Categories
2024 – Winter

Phantom

Author: Chloé Leresche

[Content warning: blood and gore depictions, physical injuries, death/death of child]

She tries to cry out, but it is swallowed by the wet and harsh fabric. Her movements too, restrained by the drapes, drowning her in her panicked heat and cold sweat. She has to go find him. She must. He was right there, going into the woods. She fights, her frustrated and desperate groans increasing as she suffocates in the darkness that envelops her, crushes her. She must catch him before he goes. She must save him. He’s so small, the forest is going to eat him. 

The breath leaves her lungs as she meets the ground. For a moment, all is quiet, and only the heavy dark exists above her. There is nothing, and he is not here. Only then does she feel the cold lurking, sliding on her skin as would the embrace of a dead man, biting in her flesh under her sweat. Her son is not here. The gasping breath she takes feels like void filing her lungs, like toxic mist, making its painful way through her insides, to her rotten liver. 

The floor under her is hard, flat, steady. You are not outside. You are not with him. You are just lying there, a miserable, pitiful childless mother. Slowly, she raises her arm, and, as if it was waiting for her to calm down, the drape swipes gently to the ground. Now free, she puts her hand on her stomach. She does not wince under the cold contact of those lifeless fingers; she does not tremble as the cold kisses her all. She lies there for a while, staring at a cold dark that does not look back at her. 

Like a phantom, she gets up, and quietly, she leaves. 

She is awakened by the sun, this time. She sees it through her closed eyelids, feels it warming up hair. Then the sounds come to her, the birds’ distant but beautiful songs and the gentle touch of the leaves dancing in unison. She can smell the moss before even opening her eyes. There is a bit of morning dew on her dress and shoulders, small droplets. Some ants are walking down her bony arm, and there are other insects on her, tickling her, already claiming her body. 

A shadow passes by, behind some bushes, not far. It is quiet and light, innocent. It stops for an instant, and the small head of a young doe appears, framed by the vibrant green leaves. Its curious eyes judge her, body ready to jump and run away, but not too fearful, almost playful, even. For a moment, all is quiet, and only exist the fawn, herself, and the rays of light filtering through the tall trees above. Is this what the medieval poets envisioned, speaking of virgins and unicorns in clearings? The fawn spooks and runs. 

Like a phantom, she gets up, and quietly, she follows. She sees him from afar; frail silhouette standing before the cliff. The wind will catch him, it will grab his young limbs and throw him to his death. She calls him, yells, cries out, but the wind grabs her words, laughs at it and brushes it away. She runs, but the wind pushes back, not even bothered by her, not anything. He does not hear her, and she can only watch as the wind takes her son’s hand gently and whispers to him: “Fly.”. 

She opens her eyes in a gasp that is not quite hers. Completely still. For a moment, all is quiet, and only exists the blue of the sky above and the mocking laughter of the wind. 

She feels her crushed bones, her bleeding organs, her ribcage intertwined with her son’s, his bones puncturing her lungs. She found him, she’s happy. The wind got them, it’s happy. 

A phantom, she gets up, and quietly, she disappears. 

Categories
2024 – Winter

Hopelessness or What’s the point

Author: Hopeful

I have always wanted children.

Ever since I can remember,

That has been my biggest dream.

Today. I feel utterly hopeless.

With World War III on our doorstep.

Climate change no one cares about.

A new form of dictator in the US.

I wanted to say he was an H***** 2.0

But my dad said I couldn’t compare the two.

And I think he’s right.

It is different.

But maybe also because it is less obvious today.

Deportation, and words, and walls are not like gas.

Though a wall was in Germany too.

I feel like so many people don’t care that much.

“It’s just four years,” they’ll say

Well, is it?

I was talking to my boyfriend earlier.

“What’s the point?” was our conclusion.

What’s the point of being careful and humane.

Why not take the plane and eat meat and take baths all the time

What’s the point about what we’re doing.

We want to give the world a better future.

We want to teach our children.

God, we just want to live.

But what’s the point?

When so many people vote for separation.

For climate oblivion

For women’s death.

What’s the point?

And honestly, I wanted to cheer my boyfriend up.

And I was struggling.

It all seems so bleak.

Do I really want to bring children to such a fucked-up world?

What is the point except making them suffer?

Kamala Harris wrote that only in the darkest of times

Can you see the stars in the sky.

And though I want to believe her.

I see the sky and I only see fog.

What is the point?

It is so much easier to be a careless human.

I don’t want to

I still have dreams.

I still want children.

But how selfish is that?

So, I ask you.

I ask the world.

The people out there who think like me.

What is the point?

Because I feel alone. I think the world feels alone too.

Left out.

We need now more than ever to find the point of all this.

And not to give up.