{"id":632,"date":"2016-12-19T08:01:22","date_gmt":"2016-12-19T07:01:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/?p=632"},"modified":"2018-10-11T19:49:56","modified_gmt":"2018-10-11T17:49:56","slug":"twitter-tirade","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/2016\/12\/twitter-tirade\/","title":{"rendered":"Twitter Tirade"},"content":{"rendered":"

Image<\/strong>:\u00a0\u00a9 Corey Raymond Heimlich<\/span><\/p>\n

Author<\/strong>: Corey Raymond Heimlich<\/p>\n

Dude, this guy is straight up cre-cre\u2026<\/p>\n

All this got me like hey yo, this fool for real?<\/p>\n

Dat one crazy gringo bra<\/p>\n

oye ese g\u00fcey est\u00e1 bien loco\u2026qu\u00e9 desmadre<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I\u2019ve dabbled in everything, from real estate to reality TV,<\/p>\n

I even founded a university giving phony degrees.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not racist I own a few Harlem brownstones,<\/p>\n

Can\u2019t wait to take the White House and the joystick of drones.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I\u2019m fed up with all this political correctness,<\/p>\n

I\u2019m white and I\u2019m proud and you know it\u2019s infectious.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not afraid to call it by its name,<\/p>\n

It\u2019s Islamic terrorism and Muslims are to blame.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

White men with ties, now that\u2019s whom to trust,<\/p>\n

We\u2019re Christian and righteous and can turn you to dust.<\/p>\n

I kill it with charm and law and order,<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll build a great wall along the Mexican Border.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Brought up by my bootstraps, I\u2019m a working-class hero,<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll make everything great again, starting from zero.<\/p>\n

All politicians lie, it\u2019s part of this business,<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll make sure everyone has a tremendous Christmas.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Twitter them this and twitter them back,<\/p>\n

Shovel them shit just make sure it\u2019s whack.<\/p>\n

I might add that I love a good artichoke,<\/p>\n

The world isn\u2019t warming it\u2019s a ludicrous hoax.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Doesn\u2019t my daughter have a \u201cnice figure?\u201d<\/p>\n

I just wish her knockers were a little bit bigger.<\/p>\n

I love women for everything they\u2019re worth,<\/p>\n

I mean at the end of the day, I don\u2019t think I could give birth.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Did I leave anything out? sometimes I get sloppy,<\/p>\n

\u00a0The Mexicans at my hotels make great chicken teriyaki.<\/p>\n

The media lies about me, it\u2019s very unfair,<\/p>\n

I\u2019m the president for all Americans, I got here fair and square.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Of course, I\u2019m all for the LGBTQ,<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a nice club they\u2019ve got, I just wish it were true.<\/p>\n

Of course Black Lives Matter, I listen to Tupac,<\/p>\n

His star\u2019s next to mine on Hollywood\u2019s sidewalk.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

And one last thing about the KKK,<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t see a problem and I don\u2019t wear a toupee.<\/p>\n

Putin and I will be the best of buds,<\/p>\n

We\u2019ll rid the world of these terrible thugs.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Can you believe it they voted for me?<\/p>\n

We\u2019ll be lucky to be left with a pile of debris.<\/p>\n

What\u2019s wrong with me this sounds like Dr. Seuss,<\/p>\n

A Grinch and a conman is on the loose.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It is with great sadness that I bid you adieu,<\/p>\n

I must head downtown for an important rendezvous.<\/p>\n

Pondering all I\u2019ve said from the top of Trump Tower,<\/p>\n

I plan my next tweet over a tremendous whiskey sour.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Image:\u00a0\u00a9 Corey Raymond Heimlich Author: Corey Raymond Heimlich Dude, this guy is straight up cre-cre\u2026 All this got me like hey yo, this fool for real? Dat one crazy gringo bra oye ese g\u00fcey est\u00e1 bien loco\u2026qu\u00e9 desmadre   I\u2019ve dabbled in everything, from real estate to reality TV, I even founded a university giving […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1001261,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[48],"tags":[36],"class_list":{"0":"post-632","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-winter16","7":"tag-poetry"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/632","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1001261"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=632"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/632\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=632"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=632"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=632"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}