{"id":5529,"date":"2025-05-15T21:04:26","date_gmt":"2025-05-15T19:04:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/?p=5529"},"modified":"2025-05-15T21:04:26","modified_gmt":"2025-05-15T19:04:26","slug":"tinder-tales-the-classic-edition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/2025\/05\/tinder-tales-the-classic-edition\/","title":{"rendered":"Tinder Tales: The Classic Edition"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Image:<\/strong> \u00a9 Christian Lue | Unsplash<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Author:<\/strong> Andreia Abreu Remigio<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ever wondered what would happen if the authors we all study put down their quills and picked up Tinder? I tried to imagine what their profile bios would say, with a little twist on famous quotes. Tragic, romantic, maybe unhinged… Enjoy!<\/mark><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

William S. <\/strong>Age 52
8 miles away
\u201cTo swipe left, or not to swipe left\u2026 that is the question\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \n
  • Bard by day, poet by night<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Looking for a young Juliet (iykyk)<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Fluent in iambic pentameter and the language of love ;)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
    \n\n\n\n

    Jane A. <\/strong>Age 40
    12 miles away
    \u201cIt isn\u2019t what we say or think that defines us, but who we crush on\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

      \n
    • Sarcastic, witty, and independent<\/li>\n\n\n\n
    • If you ghost me, I shall turn you into a cautionary tale<\/li>\n\n\n\n
    • Darcy types only, no #Wickhams allowed<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
      \n\n\n\n

      Virginia W. <\/strong>Age 59
      4 miles away
      \u201cSome people go to priests; others to poetry; I to Tinder.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

        \n
      • Swipe left if you\u2019re not a feminist<\/li>\n\n\n\n
      • Stream of consciousness included, no extra charge<\/li>\n\n\n\n
      • Dating me would be a modernist slay<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
        \n\n\n\n

        Byron the Lord <\/strong>Age 36
        15 miles away
        \u201cA mistress never is nor can be a friend.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

          \n
        • Poet. Rebel. Lover<\/li>\n\n\n\n
        • Swipe right and I\u2019ll take you on a trip to Switzerland<\/li>\n\n\n\n
        • If you like your romances dramatic and your poetry passionate, let\u2019s talk<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
          \n\n\n\n

          Geoffrey C. <\/strong>Age 57
          21 miles away
          \u201cLove is blind but I ain\u2019t\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

            \n
          • Storyteller, poet, and OG road trip buddy<\/li>\n\n\n\n
          • Fluent in Middle English (but I\u2019ll translate for you, babe)<\/li>\n\n\n\n
          • Let\u2019s pilgrimage to the best pubs together<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
            \n\n\n\n

            Mary S. <\/strong>Age 53
            6 miles away
            \u201cLooking for someone to bring my love life back to life.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

              \n
            • Into some weird kinks<\/li>\n\n\n\n
            • Dark academia is my only vibe<\/li>\n\n\n\n
            • If you\u2019re emotionally unavailable, at least be interestingly tragic<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
              \n\n\n\n

              Edgar P. <\/strong>Age 40
              3 miles away
              \u201cNevermore will I swipe left for true love.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

                \n
              • Poet and ornithologist<\/li>\n\n\n\n
              • I\u2019m broke but I\u2019ll write you love letters<\/li>\n\n\n\n
              • Let\u2019s make each other\u2019s hearts beat a little too loud<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
                \n\n\n\n

                Oscar W. <\/strong>Age 46
                9 miles away
                \u201cTo match is the rarest thing in the world. Most people swipe, that is all.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

                  \n
                • Witty and charming <3<\/li>\n\n\n\n
                • #Fashionista<\/li>\n\n\n\n
                • Looking for someone who appreciates the finer (and funnier) things in life<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
                  \n\n\n\n

                  Emily D. <\/strong>Age 55
                  5 miles away
                  \u201cThe soul should always swipe right, ready to welcome the ecstatic experience\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

                    \n
                  • Looking for a long-distance relationship<\/li>\n\n\n\n
                  • Might write you a love poem, might just ghost you (literally)<\/li>\n\n\n\n
                  • Let\u2019s overanalyze everything<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n
                    \n\n\n\n

                    And one last special profile… The man who assigned several texts published in this issue…<\/mark><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

                    Douglas K.<\/strong> Age 70
                    0 miles away
                    \u201cLove is a battlefield, and sometimes we get wounded in the process\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

                      \n
                    • Don\u2019t even bother if you\u2019re not going to write me 500 words everyday<\/li>\n\n\n\n
                    • I occasionally cosplay as a 9-year-old autistic French girl. It\u2019s not what you think<\/li>\n\n\n\n
                    • My only ick is when people share my secrets<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

                      Image: \u00a9 Christian Lue | Unsplash Author: Andreia Abreu Remigio Ever wondered what would happen if the authors we all study put down their quills and picked up Tinder? I tried to imagine what their profile bios would say, with a little twist on famous quotes. Tragic, romantic, maybe unhinged… Enjoy! William S. Age 528 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1002190,"featured_media":5530,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[86],"tags":[70],"class_list":{"0":"post-5529","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-2025-spring","8":"tag-special-features"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5529","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1002190"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5529"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5529\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5550,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5529\/revisions\/5550"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5530"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5529"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5529"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp.unil.ch\/musemagazine\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5529"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}